DOWNTIME

“I’m hurt and i can’t ride :( the only thing that keeps me from annihilation station - i need an exodus- what’s next? Because I’m going from a butterfly to a night crawler- some one catch me before I fall, or...if i can’t enjoy this snow then my metamorphosis has begun. When i spun round and instead of going up I’m goin’ down- feed me Tequilla and/or Crown- anything to turn this frown royally upside down”

I had a momentary lapse of strong-will when I wrote the above, Feb 18th. We spend so much time reevaluating our senses in order to stay positive and live our lives free of the paper weight. There has to be a time when inevitably, the weight gets to be heavy, and just as the snow comes toppling down the rooftop, a moment can be spent in silence as you allow yourself to find a low point in being. Just as there is a yin to every yang, there will always be a low to a high. It is in how you allow yourself to feed into it and it is in how you allow it to affect the deepest innards that we must be reflective toward. We are, after all, human. Whatever that means! HA!

I feel I entered an abyssal obsidian space for a reflective moment, and realized at the end of the two week + two (harsh) day down period, that it was alright to have a feeling of disappointment. It is always alright to have a down time, so long as one can come through to the other side in one piece. I have suffered from 5 seasons of downtime:- Winter and Me = lots of air time, lots of height, and my four little pegs to catch it all upon a hard pack non snowed terrain-(yes, yes- all my fault). At some time, it’s not always going to work out. Injury city has been a phenomenon I have not had to really ever deal with until the last 5 years. Funny enough, I quit competing Boardercross after winning Nationals for fear of being injured!

 After my somewhat severe injuries last year, on top of the ones prior, I definitely became sullen when I discovered that even after 2 weeks of (current) downtime, I still could not ride. My idea of an injury free season was largely crushed and my desire to win back lost time from other injuries was squashed. However, one might ask, why am I so inclined to continue to live this way and not learn from these mistakes? I do learn. I learn how to take a blow with onset. I learn to try not to make the same mistake twice. Every injury has had a different story. I have learned from each. This is something I must do to enjoy life the way I want to know it.

A diet crush is just not a diet for me. A SLAM crush is. Jack it up. The sensation that I feel when I am in the air, and one of the few girls there, is priceless. Unexplainable. The only thing I can learn is to not come down on myself when I make a mistake and feel the pain. Time is endless in the universe and short lived in this physical waking life. We have to treat ourselves to the endorphins we were made of. Anyone care to join me?!! I will continue to ride, when I hopefully do get back to it in March, I will stay off the big jumps for the remainder of the season, but when that fresh Miracle March hits, I’m gunna be ready. And I’m open to any fresh reminders from friends to be good to my physical health while riding. No terrain park jumps! Cheers *)

><)))*>...fishin food for thought...